Ep. 143: Bi the Way: Surprising Facts About Bisexuality

Have you ever wondered what it truly means to be bisexual? Are you curious about the dynamics of attraction beyond the binary? With Bisexuality Day around the corner on September 23rd, now is the perfect time to explore these questions. In this solo episode, I dive into the most frequently asked questions about bisexuality, debunk common myths, and share insights to help everyone — whether you are bisexual, straight, or just curious — better understand this often-misunderstood identity. Tune in for an episode that will broaden your perspective and answer questions you didn’t even know you had.

Dr. Kanwal Bawa is America's favorite sex doctor, and the host of America's number one sex podcast, Dr. Sex Fairy. She is Cleveland Clinic trained, and a pioneer in the fields of sexual wellness, skin rejuvenation and hair restoration. She has a state-of-the-art practice in Boca Raton, Florida called Bawa Medical. She earned the moniker Dr. Sex Fairy due to her incredible advances in the field of intimate and sexual wellness. She has even given a TEDx Talk titled "How to Biohack Your Sex Life."

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Transcript

Bi the Way: Surprising Facts About Bisexuality

Welcome to Dr. Sex Fairy, America's top sexuality podcast. I am Dr. Kanwal Bawa, America's favorite sex doctor, and I am here to transform your life. Today, we’re diving into a topic that is seldom discussed openly and deserves our attention: bisexuality. I am not agreeing or disagreeing with the choice. I am simply having a conversation with you about bisexuality, and it will be one that will surprise you on many levels. We will discuss how common it really is, famous people you didn’t know were bisexual, as well as the most frequently asked questions about bisexuality. So whether you are straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, curious, or simply want to learn more, this episode is for all of you. Don't forget to subscribe to the Dr. Sex Fairy podcast, leave a review, and subscribe to my YouTube channel Dr. Sex Fairy, and follow my superhit TikTok @drsexfairy, and Instagram at @therealdrsexfairy.

I am going to start by asking you a question. What do Giorgio Armani, Freddie Mercury, and Amy Winehouse have in common? They were or are all openly bisexual and have left an indelible mark on their respective fields. I was surprised when, as part of my research, I discovered how many celebrities identify as bisexual. 

Take Gerard Butler, for example. I met him at Maestro Andrea Bocelli's party at his villa in Forte dei Marmi last year. Gerard is the epitome of an alpha male and is known for his action-packed movies. He once said, “I talk about my sexuality, but it’s always glossed over. People seem to shy away from the issue. Whenever it is discussed, it’s distended and exaggerated. 'Gerard Butler is gay.' No, I’m not. I don’t know myself what I am, so it can be bewildering to see that being plugged. I have been in relationships with women. And men. That doesn’t make me gay. That doesn’t make me straight.'"

We’ll circle back to the stories behind bisexual celebrities later, but first, let’s discuss some statistics. A report from the Williams Institute at UCLA School of Law indicates that bisexual individuals make up over half of the broader community of people who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. Bisexuals have even been called the silent majority within the community. However, only about 20% of those who identify as bisexual actually come out to the important people and their lives about this. Compare this to 75% of people who identify as gay or lesbian who do.

Understanding bisexuality can be complex, so let’s break it down. Bisexuality refers to the romantic or sexual attraction to more than one gender. This doesn’t mean that a bisexual person is equally attracted to all genders, nor does it mean that their attractions are always the same. Bisexuality is fluid and can vary widely from person to person.

Unfortunately, there are many myths and misconceptions surrounding bisexuality. Let’s talk about some of these myths. One common myth is that bisexual people are promiscuous. This stereotype is not only incorrect but also harmful. Bisexual individuals, like anyone else, can have a wide range of relationship styles, from monogamous to polyamorous. It’s important to understand that sexual orientation does not determine someone’s moral character.

Another prevalent myth is that bisexuality doesn’t exist or is just a phase. This idea is particularly pervasive and damaging. Studies, such as those published in the Journal of Bisexuality, have shown that bisexuality is a valid and enduring sexual orientation. Many bisexual people have known about their attractions to multiple genders for as long as they can remember, just like people of other sexual orientations.

Speaking of studies, a study published in the Journal of Sex Research found that bisexual individuals often face unique challenges that are distinct from those experienced by gay or straight individuals. For example, bisexual people may experience “double discrimination” from both heterosexual and gay communities, and this can lead to feelings of isolation and increased mental health challenges.

Mental health is a significant concern for the bisexual community. According to research published in the Journal of Affective Disorders, bisexual individuals are at a higher risk for depression and anxiety compared to their heterosexual and gay counterparts. This increased risk is largely due to the stigma and discrimination they face. It is crucial to acknowledge these challenges and work towards creating a more inclusive and accepting environment for everyone.

Now, let’s address the intersectionality of bisexuality. Bisexual people come from all walks of life, and their experiences can be influenced by other aspects of their identity, such as race, gender, and socioeconomic status. Intersectionality is a framework that helps us understand how different aspects of a person’s identity can intersect and impact their experiences of discrimination and privilege.

It’s also important to talk about the support systems that are available for bisexual individuals. Finding a community that understands and accepts you can make a world of difference. There are numerous organizations and online communities dedicated to supporting bisexual individuals. Groups like BiNet USA, the Bisexual Resource Center, and local LGBTQ+ centers often provide resources, support groups, and community events specifically for bisexual people.

In addition to community support, therapy can be an invaluable resource for bisexual individuals. Finding a therapist who is knowledgeable about LGBTQ+ issues can help address the unique mental health challenges that bisexual people might face. Therapy can provide a safe space to explore one’s identity, work through internalized biphobia, and develop coping strategies for dealing with discrimination.

Speaking of representation, I began this episode by mentioning Freddie Mercury, the legendary lead singer of Queen, was openly bisexual and left an indelible mark on the music industry. Whitney Houston was bisexual as well, and this was even shown in “I Wanna Dance With Somebody,” the movie about her life. Other famous bisexual singers include Alanis Morissette, Demi Lovato, Billie Eilish, Cardi B, Janis Joplin, John Lennon, David Bowie and Lady Gaga. Mexican artist Frida Kahlo was bisexual too. Famous bisexual actors include Cary Grant, Angelina Jolie, Drew Barrymore, Greta Garbo and James Dean. 

These individuals have made incredible contributions in their fields, showing that there is no single "type" when it comes to bisexuality. Their diverse backgrounds and achievements demonstrate that bisexuality transcends stereotypes and can be found in all walks of life. Visibility matters. When bisexual individuals are visible and their experiences are acknowledged, it helps to normalize bisexuality and reduce stigma. Visibility also provides validation for those who may be struggling with their identity, showing them that they are not alone and that their feelings are valid.

Now, let’s address some common questions and concerns that people might have about bisexuality. One question I often hear is, “How do I know if I’m bisexual?” Understanding your sexual orientation can be a deeply personal and sometimes confusing journey. It’s important to give yourself the time and space to explore your feelings without pressure or judgment. Remember, there is no rush to label yourself, and it’s okay to take your time to understand your attractions.

Another common question is, “Can bisexual people be in monogamous relationships?” Absolutely! Bisexual individuals, like anyone else, can have a wide range of relationship styles, from monogamous to polyamorous. Being bisexual doesn’t mean that someone is inherently more likely to cheat or be promiscuous. It simply means they are attracted to more than one gender.

Let’s not forget the importance of communication in all relationships. If you are in a relationship with a bisexual person, open and honest communication is key. It is important to create a safe space for your partner to express their feelings and experiences. Understanding your partner’s bisexuality can strengthen your relationship and foster a deeper connection. It does not mean that you have to bring other people into the relationship. It just helps you understand better where your partner is coming from.

So what kind of relationships do bisexual individuals have? They can be in any type of relationship, including monogamous, open, or polyamorous relationships. It is essential to differentiate between bisexuality and polyamory because they are often confused. Bisexuality is about who you are attracted to, while polyamory is about how you structure your relationships. A bisexual person can be monogamous, which means that they choose to have one partner at a time, or they can be polyamorous, meaning they have consensual relationships with multiple partners simultaneously. Polyamory is also called consensual non-monogamy.

The key difference is that bisexuality refers to sexual orientation, while polyamory refers to relationship structure. Both can coexist, but they are not inherently linked. For instance, a bisexual person can be in a monogamous relationship with someone of any gender, just as they can be in a polyamorous relationship.

Another question I get from time to time is whether bisexual people have a preference for one gender over another. It varies from person to person. Some bisexual individuals might have a stronger attraction to one gender, while others might feel equally attracted to multiple genders. Bisexuality is fluid, and attractions can change over time. As this episode comes to an end, my message to you is that whether you agree or disagree with this lifestyle choice, I hope that you will show those who choose to be bisexual kindness, empathy and support.

Don’t forget to subscribe to the Dr. Sex Fairy podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or another podcast app and leave a review. Subscribe to the Dr. Sex Fairy YouTube channel. Follow me on TikTok @drsexfairy, and Instagram @therealdrsexfairy. You can also reach out to me at Bawa Medical, my Boca Raton, Florida office at 1-877-DRSEXFAIRY or visit drsexfairy.com. Dr. Sex Fairy Supplements are linked in the podcast description below. Until next time!